Consistency: How To Maintain Your Identity, And Love, In The Midst Of A Trying World

I wrote this a few years ago and thought it was worth another share:

This morning I was feeling somewhat sorry for myself, but I quickly repented and began to thank God for His faithfulness. A word I had written years ago literally fell into my lap and I was reminded of His goodness ... So I thought I'd share it with those of you who are struggling with finding happiness and joy in a selfish, disappointing world...

In 1 Samuel 4 we see God's people twice defeated, losing 4,000 men in the first battle against the Philistines, and losing 30,000 in the second battle.

Even though God was with them (the Ark of the Covenant was present in the second battle), they lost anyway.

Eli, a judge who had judged Israel (God's chosen people) for 40 years had two sons to die in the second battle. When he heard of this, and that the Philistines had captured the Ark, he fell backwards, broke his neck and died. He was 98 years old.

The Philistines, and everyone who tried to house the Ark, began to suffer a plague and die. So they sent the Ark back to the Israelites.

What's the moral of this story?

What God showed me is that He knows the heartbreak Eli must've felt in that moment when he lost his two sons, nay, when the very "presence" of God (symbolized by the Ark) was no longer possessed by the Israelites, His people. In that moment, Eli's heart fainted within him. He lost the will to live. His dreams, all his days laid down for King and country, his future, his children, (seemingly his God) & all that he had worked for, had been stolen. He was too old to see the light at the end of the tunnel, in earth years anyways.

How many of us have felt that way? Like our "babies" have been lost. Our children, whether biological or adopted ... our dreams, original or new ... have died and there is seemingly no explanation.

"I know that I know that I know God was with me. He's always been with me. So, why did this happen???" .... Grief says.

The people of Israel said, "why are we losing the battle? Why was victory not ours, even when God was there?"

This morning I felt like God shared with me that the only way He, as a loving Father, can cope with losing his children, His dreams, when they go astray or when they've been defeated in battle, is for Him to stay consistent.

What does He mean by consistent?

In the following chapter after the Ark has been captured, God's presence that rested on the Ark did not diminish. Just because the Philistines won a battle, doesn't mean God lessened who He was. He never lessened His goodness, faithfulness, power, etc.

The Ark was placed in the same room with the idol of the Philistines, and everyday their idol would fall down. They'd set it back up, and it would fall down. This happened over and over again.

God remained strong, good, present, true ... and His refusal to change or weaken because of these evil people, because of this temporarily lost dreams ... His refusal brought a plague on His enemies, forcing the Philistines to send the Ark back to God's family.

When we suffer loss of a child, loss of a dream, loss of a battle, we will only thrive long-term if we make up our minds to be like God our Father.

We cannot afford to dwell on the child or dream we lost, though there may always be a bittersweetness and a sting deep in our chest after they're gone.

We MUST be constant, steady, true, good, & faithful to love the people around us as God loves us, regardless of our losses. We cannot allow loss to diminish the nature of God inside of us.

Why?

God said the only way He gets through times of loss (and, let's remember He loses many sons and daughters on a daily basis in the Earth) ... is by focusing on RELATIONSHIP WITH INDIVIDUALS.

He is more concerned with having a relationship with you and me than with anything else. We were created for relationship. His eyes search to-and-fro for that one person who will be His friend and walk with Him in unity of purpose. There is nothing more important to Him than for us to partner with Him to love the individual in front of us.

"As much as it pains Me," He says, "I must turn my eyes from those who do not want Me, or even want to know Me, and focus on those who do. There's always someone who desires to walk with Me. Those are the people I stay strong for and focused on."

(And, if those rejecting individuals ever decide to come back to Him, He will welcome them with open arms)

God is not moved by circumstance. His love is good, constant, true and everlasting. He'll be there if we choose Him. He'll be there if we don't.

He will not diminish all that He is based on what others think about Him.

He does not wear rejection.

He does not wear pain.

He does not wear grief.

He does not wear self-pity.

He chooses daily to lay down His life, His very heart, to love even when He's not being loved in return.

He is who He is ... and He will love with all His heart fervently for eternity.

He is unchanging ... and His love is bigger than our waverings and doubts.

I choose to lay down my grieving over lost dreams, sons, daughters, etc......and I choose to focus on being constant and strong for those who remain with me.

I will not change because I've been rejected. I will remain good, and my love for those people who rejected me will never diminish.

I choose to suffer long with selfish people who fail to show up for me, for those dreams, visions and plans God has put inside of me. If they die they die. If the battle is won, or if the battle is lost ...

....but the end result will not change who I am at my core.

I AM HIS...THE DAUGHTER OF A KING WHO ALWAYS SHOWS UP FOR ME ... AND IN HIM I FIND MY STRENGTH & MY JOY.

"The unburied bones [of slaughtered dreams] shall lie scattered at the mouth of Sheol, [as unregarded] as the lumps of soil behind the plowman when he breaks open the ground.

But, my eyes are towards You, O God the Lord; in You do I trust and take refuge; pour not out my life nor leave it destitute and bare.

Keep me from the trap which they have laid for me, and the snares of evildoers.

Let the wicked fall together into their own nets, while I pass over them and escape."

Psalms 142: 7-10 Amplified Version

God knows what it's like to lose a battle.

But, He doesn't know what it's like to lose His identity.

His strength ... forged in the depth of vulnerability ... empowers Him to love, one day at a time, even when He's not being loved in return.

Will I dare to love those even when they don't love me?

Will I dare to focus on those I can save, rather than on those I've lost?

Will I allow His strength to work through me today so that I can show His love to my neighbor?

I must lay down my right to be offended (when I've been rejected).

I must lay down my right to grieve where the battle has been lost.

I must lay down my right to feel sorry for myself.

I must even lay down my right to lay down and die (if I'm not 98 like Eli yet).

I must choose His strength in my times of disappointment & weakness.

It is in this place of forgiveness and grace we find our hope, peace, rest...and the strength to keep going.

Satan will not diminish my voice (Father's voice through me), regardless of how many battles I lose. He will not stop me from loving God's children.

I may get knocked down, but I will get back up again. I will shout God's goodness from the rooftops. I will not change based on other's response to me or based on how many battles I win.

I AM HIS AND HE IS MINE <3 #family #consistency #love #identity

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